Absolut (y) Effen Exquisite!
by Patricia Noonan

I've always felt that vodka has a lot in common with the quintessential little black dress. If it's a good little black dress, than you can do many things with it.
You can go classic, dress it up or dress it down, depending on the accessories and the occasion.
Three of the latest vodkas on the market suit this concept quite nicely.

Effen Vodka comes from Holland. I know, it sounds rude, but the word effen means smooth in Dutch so the producers decided to have a little fun with this name. Effen is wheat based, has a lush mouthfeel and hints of lemony citrus peel. They also do something unusual instead of going with the traditional carbon filtration. Effen uses peat filtration. Sounds like the vodka will be peaty but it's not. The elegant and simple design of the bottle is quite modern and useful too. It has a white rubber label that allows you to get a good non-slip grip when pouring, preferably straight from the freezer. Accidents do happen, but this will definitely prevent any. My bottle came with a cute pair of black panties with the brand name, so I'm guessing the idea is to enjoy this vodka even when you're skipping out of that little black dress and into something more comfortable. Makes me think of that famous movie line. "Let's get out of these wet clothes and into a dry martini' from a Billy Wilder flick.

The re-launch of Wyborowa's 'Exquisite' Single Estate vodka from Poland comes to remind you that this is an exquisitely made spirit. Sourced from Dankoskie Golden Rye from Western Poland, the vodka is fashionably understated elegance delivered in a Frank Gehry designed bottle. No undies with this though. The bottle is classy enough not have to use an attention getter like that. I call this the 'haute couture' of vodkas. It's sheer elegance, with a supple mouthfeel and gentle hint of sweet citrus. My all time favourite martini quote is perfect for this vodka.
"Martini's should be stirred, not shaken, so the molecules lie sensuously on top of one another" by Somerset Maugham

Absolut Pears is the new flavour dressed vodka on the block. With ripe pear essence aromas, I can almost imagine it's an eaux-de-vie. Crisp flavour, like biting into an Anjou pear, makes this an interesting new twist for a martini, a Champagne cocktail or even a Collins. My other favourite quote for this is appropo, as this vodka goes down really easy. Dorothy Parker, the infamous martini swilling writer said " I like to have a martini, but only two at most. After three I'm under the table, After four, I'm under the host " so enjoy the pear fruit of Absolut and don't get too carried away. No undies with this product either.

Cocktails to try....

EFFEN Blackbook

1 part EFFEN vodka
1 part Late Harvest Vidal

Chill cocktail glass
Fill cocktail shaker with ice and stir ingredients until chilled.
Strain into glass
Garnish with frozen grapes if desired.

EFFEN Fashionista

1 oz Effen vodka
1 oz Pomegranite juice
1/2 ounce simple syrup
Squeeze of fresh lime juice

Chill cocktail glass or use rocks glass with ice
Shake ingredients in ice filled cocktail shaker
Strain into glass
Garnish with a slice of star fruit

Undressed

2 oz of Exquisite Vodka

Store bottle in the freezer for a couple of hours prior to use.
Pour the vodka into a stylish, chilled shot or cocktail glass
Clothing optional...

Green Soul

1 1/2 oz of Absolut Pears Vodka
2 dashes of Noilly Prat (or dry vermouth of choice)

Chill cocktail glass
Fill cocktail shaker with ice and stir or swirl ingredients
Strain into chilled glass
Garnish with twist of lemon

This article may be quoted as long as the author
 and this publication (Vintage Assessments) is properly
credited along with the link for contacting us
(patricianoonan@vintageassessments.com) is included.

Advance written permission is required for any commercial usage
and/or reference to out of date notes. All rights are retained by the author.